Jim Varagona

>Spending Time With My Daughter

>My daughter Sadie has really been getting on my case lately since I have been unemployed. She always wants to play ball or have me throw pieces of overcooked waffles at her face. The other day, she sat on me until we did something amazingly fun.


Considering how lazy I am, I taught her how to drive, so she could take me around town for job interviews, getting bon-bons at the grocery store, and filling up the tank. I still haven’t perfected having her pump gas though.

I hate that she insists on listening to Top 40 radio. I can only take so much of Shakira’s “Hips Don’t Lie”. Soon she will appreciate the likes of Johnny Cash. Mark my words.

>Come Out of Your Hole, Michael McGrath

>The story that never ends and one of the topics that originally pushed me to blog (see DiabetoBlog #1: McGrath Didn’t Molest Me…Thank God) is back again with more predictable, yet insane news. From today’s STLToday.com:

New lawsuit alleges abuse by often-sued former priest
By
Robert Patrick
ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH
07/06/2006

The most-sued former priest in St. Louis was sued again Thursday by a man who says he was abused 30 years ago as an altar boy and student at St. Ferdinand Church in Florissant. The 20th lawsuit against Michael McGrath alleges that he fondled the boy, identified only as “John Doe GJ,” at least once on an outing sometime between 1976 and 1978. At the time, McGrath was an associate pastor and teacher, and the boy was 10 or 11 years old, the suit says. The man, now around 40 years old and living in Missouri, did not remember what happened until sometime in the past year, said lawyer Ken Chackes. In a prepared statement, the man said that he felt as if his life had “flat-lined,” as if he had been “held back.”

The suit says that the St. Louis Archdiocese knew or should have known that McGrath had a “dangerous propensity to abuse children” and that the church should have better supervised McGrath. McGrath was ordained in 1975, removed from public ministry in 1997 and laicized in 2005. He served in parishes and schools in St. Louis, St. Louis County and St. Charles County, the archdiocese said. McGrath’s lawyer, J. Martin Hadican, said Thursday morning that he could not comment on the lawsuit’s allegations. Archdiocese spokesman Tony Huenneke said that the archdiocese had settled or mediated one complaint and 15 lawsuits against McGrath for a total of $793,600. Huenneke said the archdiocese would not have settled the cases if officials did not believe the accusations to be credible.

This is crazy. So this occurence comes from an accuser that “did not remember what happened until sometime in the past year”, which is a bit fishy unless you go for the idea of repressed memories. Still, I think this case bears fruit simply because we are dealing with “The most-sued former priest in St. Louis”.

Mike, you got to be happy with the ring of that.

It’s good that the Archdiocese believes the accusations to be credible and isn’t putting up a defense of lies to protect one of their boys…well, he used to be (McGrath was dismissed from the priesthood in February of last year). I still echo my sentiment from my very first blog by asking “where does the settlement money come from?” The close to $800,000 used simply to “settle” with McGrath’s many other accusers had to come from somewhere, and considering the fund raising of the Catholic Church, the whole situation makes me feel uneasy.

Speaking of feeling uneasy, my wife was watching the news with me earlier when we learned of this new development.

Notice what his shirt says (“He Knows When You Are Sleeping”).

McGrath’s crooked sneer flashed on the screen and she asked me sarcastically, “Are you sure he didn’t do anything to you?”

It’s only been about 9 years since I’ve seen that piece of filth, so I think the image of such a traumatic event would be burnt in my mind. I’m sure if I was haunted by such a thing that I would find suitable punishment for the man, besides settling for money from his former employer.

The former molesting priest apparently still resides in Richmond Heights (at 1433 Hawthorne Place), which is in the St. Louis Metropolitan area. I’m surprised no one has tracked him down for an interview, to picket in front of his house, or to drag him out and give him lashings.

And what kind of a man defends these idiots? J. Martin Hadican is no stranger to defending holy sex offenders. I easily found reference to him defending none other than Bryan Kuchar, the other molesting priest I came in contact with in my life during a year in grade school at St. Joan of Arc in St. Louis, while he was a transitional deacon, basically one step from being a priest. Kuchar was sentenced to 3 years in jail in November of 2003.

It’s a shame that the statute of limitations lets McGrath sit back and relax. There should be a provision that states after so many lawsuits for something so dispicable, you can just throw the guy in jail for a while. If he takes issue with that, I welcome him to speak up for himself, instead of hiding behind his attorney’s words. Come out of your hole, you inglorious bastard!

UPDATE 6/20/2007: I just watched Deliver Us From Evil, an excellent documentary focusing on a dirty priest. It gives an insightful and disturbing look into the mindset of one of these men.

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>Jorblessness and the Measure of Success

>I received two passionate responses to “Things Have Changed”, a posting in which I dwelled upon the success of NBA players younger than I and compared it to where I am now in my life. I thank Jeremy and Sergio for being consistent readers and for looking out for the Diabeto.

I didn’t mean for it to seem like my measure of success is solely based on money. Those b-ballers and shot callers aren’t the greatest people on earth, even the best athletes. Considering my plight though, and looking at things from my side of the fence, it would be nice to have some cash, and those boys seem to get it easy.

The posting also dealt with the flow of life, how things can be a certain way for a while, then suddenly change. It certainly keeps things interesting, but can also be a pain in the ass.

I cannot ask for sympathy. Several job leads have come my way, which I have passed upon simply because they were too similar to my last situation. I’d rather keep looking because the taste in my mouth is still pretty friggin’ bitter. The “Ramp Down” effect, as the leaked memo from my former employer referred to it as, took me down hard. I don’t understand why companies need to change the wording of these things so much when they could just say, “We’re downsizing to keep the greenbacks coming”, or “Instead of skimming from the bottom of our seniority, we’re skimming pond scum…and you’re it.”

As Sergio suggested, mooching meals works well and keeps the wife fed and happy. She has found employment, but unfortunately the checks won’t be seen for weeks, given the time she entered the pay cycle and the stage of the moon at that point.

I am certain that this is all for the better. When you have to create a fictional world of mobsters and intrigue to cover the boring nature of a job as a glorified stockboy, it’s probably better off to cut loose. That isn’t to say the job didn’t have any intrigue, but I’m not so sure that “Secrets of the Retail Servicing World” could bump the ratings juggernaut of “Internet Predators Caught”.

It is disturbing to me though, that my charismatic self could be shaved off of the donkey, leaving behind men that torture innocent animals by stomping on them and dragging their feet, leaving behind a bloody mess.

And that’s the truth.

>Things Have Changed

>

“People are crazy and times are strange
I’m locked in tight, I’m out of range
I used to care, but things have changed.”

–Bob Dylan, Things Have Changed

Bobby is right, times are strange. And it’s odd how I can gauge that. Last night, the annual draft for the NBA occured. That is when the general managers and other head honcho’s for the 30 teams in the National Basketball Association get together to pick players from college teams and other international organizations to better their own teams.

For some reason, even though I am not always the biggest fan of watching basketball on TV, I get a great kick out of the business of it. That goes for a lot of sports. In fact, when I play the video game versions, I spend more time on the business aspect of thins than playing the actual games.

I began watching the NBA draft in 1992, for 2 primary reasons–Shaquille O’neal and Anthony Peeler. Shaquille was touted as an animal athelete. He was 7 feet and 1 inch tall and around 300 pounds of man. The Orlando Magic drafted him with the first pick, which they earned through a lottery of the worst teams. He was to be their savior. Shaq did take them to the NBA Finals during the 1995-96 season, but left them in the following offseason for the L.A. Lakers.

During that 1992 NBA Draft, the Lakers selected Anthony Peeler with the 15th pick. Peeler was from the University of Missouri, and the first big pick from my area since Anthony Bonner went to the Sacramento Kings as the 23rd pick in the 1990 Draft. It was exciting since this type of thing didn’t happen often. Peeler’s career hasn’t amounted to much, except for him being a solid player to have off the bench. He did lead the league in three point field goal percentage during the 2003-04 season with the Washington Wizards.

We know where Shaq’s career has gone. He just nabbed his 4th NBA title ring with the Miami Heat, the team he left the Lakers for in 2004 after some public feuding with Kobe Bryant.

Since that amazing draft in 1992 that reeled me into the drama of the business of sports, professional basketball in particular, I have watched it every year, at least the first round, since. Keep in mind, I am not the jocky, sporty type of guy. I fit into a more dorky, nerdy mold, if any.

During my high school years, this annual observance involved my good friend, Picklehead, who shared the same passion as I did. We even incorporated the video games, by creating many of the drafted players and trying them out on their new teams. After I graduated, I still watched, but with less enthusiastic parties, that laughed at me for my enjoyment of the business and not the sport itself.

It still was a ritual for me that lasted until this year. It wasn’t because the prospects for the draft weren’t as good, which they weren’t. It wasn’t that I didn’t have anyone to share my love for it with, which I haven’t in a while. My wife thinks it is silly, as much as some of my previous friends have.

Things have changed though.

I have moved out of my parents’ place, becoming more independent, but with that, poorer and without cable. Now I am married and currently jobless.

I did have the internet to keep up to date on the happenings of the Draft, but it wasn’t the same. Seeing names appearing on my screen wasn’t like watching it all unfold with predictions from commentators and interviews with the draftees, who are now all younger than me, and once their name is announced, much richer than I will ever be.

That’s how this country works though. In a way, it is still a beautiful thing. Within seconds, one can become a millionaire, based on athletic prowess, or some other talent, which probably doesn’t deserve a pile of money. We pay to see their show for us, though, whether it be professional basketball or some rock star playing a guitar on a stage of pyrotechnics, because it’s an escape from the nonsense of our daily lives. We can’t bash them for that, because we fund their lives.

I think I’ll go shoot some hoops now…shit…can’t, I have a job interview.

>The Angry Rant of a Downsized Diabeto

>Since I am angry, there are things I must address. My analyst says it would be healthy and wise.

To my landlady:

The grass is 3 weeks grown again. Tiny little trees are sprouting that Bob Ross would be proud of–god rest his soul. I refuse to pick up my dog’s dung anymore until it is cut, especially considering the insects that now inhabit the wilderness that is the backyard I put rent money towards. They got a healthy lunch in the form of my shins and calves.

In other news, a month and a day after
my nuptials, the Don informs me that a week from yesterday will be my last with the company. The official word is that someone had to be downsized. The unofficial word is that, well, I guess my thoughts on that will wait until I separate from the company.

I did think though, as an observation, that downsizing usually skimmed from the bottom of the totem pole. Considering where I am on the ladder of seniority, that theory certainly wouldn’t work here. It makes one wonder who to believe and trust.

Since, being put it this lonely and awkward position by a company I put a good 9 months in for, I have no choice but to dissolve the Italian Retail Service, including the honorary Pinoy wing. This will take effect immediately.

Now what do I do during my lame duck week with the company? It feels strange putting forth effort for an organization that deemed me unfit, or too pooped to pop for them. Speaking of that, why is it that it is respectable for employees to give employers two weeks notice, but the employees are not given such respect? Rodney Dangerfield hit the nail on the head with a big ol’ Ludell sledgehammer.

Why must business be such a dirty thing? Why must drama and politics infiltrate every aspect of life? I know money has a lot to do with this, because profits are the bottom line. One guy goes, more money is saved. Riddle me this though…what happens to his money while the fat cats add more greenbacks to their bubbly money baths? I’m sure there are plenty more sob stories of those that were spared, but thinking of myself for a moment, I’m trying to start a new life here as a married man, and this is a hell of a fungus ridden foot to start it off on. To continue the analogy, whose gonna be my BOOM!–Tough Actin’ TINACTIN?

Save me John Madden.

This also makes me wonder, what do rich people dream about? Apparently our President has plenty of time to dream. It must be alot easier in positions of power, in which your decisions have no effect on your place in life, except maybe bringing you closer to all of those virgins in heaven. I only hope that if the virgins exist, that they are packs of angry nuns. And they’ll give them physicals too. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

Like it was for Corky on Life Goes On,

Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da, Life Goes On, whoa, la-la-la-la, Life Goes On.

>Death TV

>

Yep, he’s dead.

Yep, them too.

And we see this on the national news too. I wonder how parents explain that to their inquisitive children.

I mean I like that bad guys are dead. Yay. And I guess since our government is known to lie to us a bit, it is good that they have proof that they accomplished something, but it is still a bit weird.

And why is it that when you are watching the national evening news, bombings, murders, and other brutal, bloody events overseas are shown uncensored, even when innocents are involved? Here, our local news may be filled with murders and accidents, but they at least they use a tarp and body bags, especially when a doctor throws himself and his boys from a balcony to protest his rocky marriage, from Alton, Illinois, by the way.

I don’t know what kind of precedents we are starting here. I mean I know we live in a sick world, but there is some gray area created here that I cannot figure out. Why is it okay to show the dead of others and not our own? If we do it out of respect, why not give them respect? If we act like it is so horrible that terrrorists show off the kidnapped and murdered, why do we show off their dead and allow our soldiers to have photos of torturing their people?

What a world, what a world.

Speaking of the dead, a woman from St. Peters, Missouri, which isn’t too far from me in the STL, beat her dead chihuahua’s breeder with the corpse of the dog. Apparently at 5:30 in the morning, she broke into the woman’s home to get a new dog, since hers died so soon.

The breeder wrestled the woman out of her house to the front porch, where the woman then hit the breeder over the head numerous times with the dead puppy, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported, citing police.

This is what someone should have had a camera ready for and aired on TV. I’m sick of pointless war and terrorism.

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>Buy a Badonkadonk

>Times are a bit too busy for blogging, what with the being married and servicing so much retail, but I’m trying my best to put finger to the key.

Anyway, I was bored and browsing Amazon earlier today. It’s amazing what folks get away with, but still very amusing. Check out this tank someone’s selling. A real Badonkadonk tank for $20K, or is it?! I really enjoyed the comments below the description.

You too can find bizzare items for sale (?) on Amazon, like this inflatable party sheep. I wonder how many usable orifices it has, or if that’s the kind of gag sheep it is.

A nice throwback item is the family size pack of stink bombs. There’s nothing better than strategically placing those around the office or at school. I never did it though, because I was poultry dung as a child.

Glancing at some of these items led me to this Amazon user’s guide, which has links to more listings that got through the cracks, like pennies and nickels from 2003. He also lists my favorite real item, Anti-Monkey Butt Powder.

Feel free to comment with more links if you find them.

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>Blog of a Married Diabeto–a review of the nuptials and honeymoon

>

The happy Diabeto’s, now in married flavor!

To answer the first question people have naturally been asking me, it feels exactly the same. That’s not to say none of what has happened in the last 3 weeks has not been special. The past 5 years have pretty much been a trial marriage with my Russian grandmother, so this is simply the formalizing of it all. Before, we were happy together, like The Turtles’ tune, and now we are happily married.

An amazingly flush Diabeto and the Brothers Pinoy

I’d like to thank everyone that shared the occasion with us and those that wished us well. Even the Filipinos and that dirty old man I work with graced us with their presence. Special thanks to the Don for his gift of a set of stainless steel Knorks. We are forever indebted to him.

The ceremony was held at The Jewel Box in Forest Park, here in St. Louis. The weather cooperated and things went swimmingly. Best man Dan Roth managed to keep the rings in his posession until it was time for them to be exchanged. We were so appreciative of this feat achieved by our hippy friend.

At the reception, Dan was a real hit with his speech, during which he quoted Bob Dylan by using his line “How many roads must a man walk down, before you call him a man?” and said I must’ve walked down my last road. He also said something about my bride and I sailing away into the horizon, which makes me wonder if he got the brown acid. He also did a great rendition of Patsy Cline’s “Crazy” with my sister’s friend Cara, whcih makes one wonder further (click to watch the video).

My new sister-in-law, Amy, gave a heart wrenching toast, which quoted my first words to her…”I’m bleeding.” When I went to pick her older sister up for our first date, she approached me at my vehicle to tell me that if I hurt her sister, she would kick my ass. All I could say was “I’m bleeding,” because I just rushed out of the house with a bad shave.

Photos from the wedding and reception will be available for viewing at Collages.net until 7/27. The event name is VARAGONA and the password is 9478. Enjoy.

My babushka and I went on our honeymoon to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. It’s great to forget about what time of the day it is, what day of the week it is, and who you are, all without having horribly much to drink. The only drawback is that I get patchy burns in the sun. You’d think my Italian blood would put me more on par with my Pinoy brethren, but my midsection ended up looking more like Gorbachev’s head.

We did go parasailing, but have yet to develop the photos. That is probably for the best, considering I was whining like Woody Allen, because the knot didn’t look secure and we were over water that I couldn’t see through, except for the masses of jellyfish, that I later found out were an order whose sting couldn’t hurt humans.

The best part of the honeymoon was that we accidentally went during Bike Week, which happens every Memorial Day weekend. First the Harley boys and girls come through town and take over. We missed them. Then the sport bikers come through, which is mainly made up of young black men. Behind 80% of those men on their bikes, was a large assed black female, with variations of decoration on their buttocks, ranging from fishnet to thong to a lightly draped short skirt. We sure did get a kick out of all of the cottage cheese we got to see. Although I did not get a photo of the real thing, the following t-shirt on sale there, illustrates this amazing sight.


And then it was back to the rat race of the IRS and our new married life. We’ll always have those asses though.

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>Just Married

>
I was married on Sunday to my gal of 5 years, Shannon. Can’t you tell from the look on her face that she wanted me? We’ll be away for awhile, so stay tuned for my return after the first week on June.

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>Weird Scenes Inside the Depot

>Work has been odd lately. I really can’t tell if I like it or despise it. The IRS is a demanding group. The Don has begun referring to me as Lieutenant, which is flattering, but at the same time, puts a lot of pressure on me.

“Keep the Filipinos in line,” he tells me. “They’re creating payroll issues with hours. You’re gonna have to gaffle ’em.”

Did I sign up for this?

No, but my Italian heritage gave me this life, and I must accept it. Even if I have a BA, my calling is in retail servicing. If only the benefits were better, and the damn pirates stayed away from my products.

I have said this before, but I worked for the major fertilizer and grass seed company last year. This year, I work for their competition. My job is to make displays and make the products look pretty. These dirty grass seed pirates from the competition feel the need to destroy my displays by trashing them or slashing holes through it until it is unrecognizable like a baby calf at the veal factory. I come into my stores only to find emptied bags of seed, with holes riddled all over it. This is not the work of mice, no, this is most definitely the work of the pirates.

Why do they do it? Is there a sick satisfaction in it? I suppose so, because there is no monetary bonus for these workers at the bottom of the totem pole. They move our products where no one can see them and take over prime spaces. They throw my displayers away. BASTARDS!

They have a stranglehold on the stores that they are merchandised in because of their fancy national advertising campaigns with B-grade baseball stars. They sell more than the rest only because they defeat their competition through these dirty tactics. Management can’t do anything about it. They are bullied as well or bribed with promises of enough free fertilizer to cover 20,000 square feet and kill all of the pests that inhabit their lawn.

Our only way to fight back is to fight fire with fire. They have more manpower though. The trick is to squash them when their not looking, to use trick plays. And only then will they swim with the fishes.

Aside from the pirates, one of the my cohorts in the IRS has been exiled. When things like this occur, it is only human for rumors and innuendo to follow. I can only hope that this isn’t the beginning of the downfall of the IRS. If one guy slips up, does he take others with him? I doubt it.

Change happens at the most inopportune times. You can only roll with the punches. That goes for the war with your opponents and the drama of everyday relationships.

And you must always watch your back. I was once a pirate. I have learned much.

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